Miyamoto Retires!

It's time to party!

Or maybe rock...

...dare I say, party rock?



Every fan of Nintendo should be rejoicing.  Every non fan of Nintendo should be rejoicing.  Every cynical, jaded, former Nintendo fan should be rejoicing.

Miyamoto is stepping down to work on personal projects.

Oh dear lord...

I just... ugh...

http://www.gameinformer.com/games/the_legend_of_zelda_skyward_sword/b/wii/archive/2011/06/07/zelda-skyward-2011.aspx

While the 25th anniversary of the Legend of Zelda series had a prominent presence at the beginning of Nintendo’s E3 press conference, Skyward Sword was barely mentioned. Due out this year, we haven’t  heard much lately on the progress of Link’s next adventure

Oh, of course not, that would ruin the "surprise."

Sorry, please continue.

While the 25th anniversary of the Legend of Zelda series had a prominent presence at the beginning of Nintendo’s E3 press conference, Skyward Sword was barely mentioned. Due out this year, we haven’t  heard much lately on the progress of Link’s next adventure. Despite the lack of updates, the upcoming Wii title was playable on the show floor in the form of a new demo. I got a chance today to try out three different sections of the game - a bird riding race, a dungeon area, and a boss fight.

Bird riding was a fun segment that featured Link out of his standard adventuring garb. He resembled the farmer version from Twilight Princess, and was participating in a high-flying race for a trophy. It starts with the four participants diving off a cliff, followed by grasping and mounting a giant bird. Shaking the Wii remote makes the bird fly higher into the clouds, and the A button activates a speed boost system not unlike Epona’s carrots from previous games. Your objective is to reach a bird that’s carrying a trophy before any of your opponents, and they’ll eventually get more aggressive. After my first win, my fellow riders started shooting eggs back at me in an effort to slow my progress. Upon catching it the second time, I was treated to a cutscene of Link and an impressed Zelda flying off atop the bird.

And then they break out into song!

I can show you the woooorld...

Yes, I've missed impressing an non-princess Zelda by flying around on a bird.  I haven't done that in a Zelda game since... 

Wait, what?

Second on the agenda was the dungeon demo. This allowed me to experience more traditional Zelda gameplay, with a focus on finding keys, using items to solve puzzles, and defeating enemies. Like in Ocarina of Time’s Deku Tree, giant Skulltulas drop down from the ceiling if you get too close. Unlike those, however, there’s no immediate way to attack their weak spot. Destroying them is a mini-puzzle in itself, and it first requires you to snip their line of web with the flying beetle item. Once they’ve fallen to the ground, they’re still protected by their hard shell. Thanks to the added control afforded by MotionPlus, you can hold the sword near the ground and pop the enemy up to expose their weak point. A few stabs and a dramatic finishing move later, and they’ll be defeated.

You read that right, folks, flip it over and attack it's weak spot for massive damage!

Giant Enemy Spider! Actually happened in ancient Hyrule

After disposing of several of these Skulltulas, I started searching for a key. Flying my beetle around exposed a switch that opened a door, leading me to another puzzle. A gate guarded a treasure chest, and three ominous wall-mounted eyes watched me as I got close. They’d follow the movements of my sword like a haunted house portrait, but would quickly shut if I aimed at them with my bow. Looking around the room, I spotted a box hanging from the ceiling. I cut it down with the beetle, shoved it near the eyes, and stood on top. Now that I was close enough, all three eyes were open and following my sword. I still couldn’t shoot at them, so I spun my sword around in circles. After a few rotations, the eyes got dizzy, turned red, and disappeared. The gate opened, and I received the key I was looking for.

Such innovation! I haven's seen something like this since...

since...

Mario 64!

And it was obvious then, too!

The final section of the demo was a boss battle that relied very heavily on directional sword swipes and well-timed blocks. It was a ghostly white female, although it wasn’t clear what species in the Zelda universe she was. Rather than the immediate action of many Zelda boss fights, this woman slowly made her way towards Link. Her hand followed the movements of my blade, and she would catch it whenever I attempted to strike her. I learned that I had to get her hand set in a specific location, then quickly alter the direction of my swipe and get the upper hand.

 Okay, first things first.

That's a dude.  I know because in Japanese media there's generally two indicators of gender.  Usually rather large, round, and obvious indicators.

Secondly, I assume the 'species' is the same as the sword-fairy-master sword-girl from the concept art.

After striking her numerous times in this manner, she started backing up and throwing projectiles at me in lines of five. I initially dodged them by jumping to the side, but you can also deflect them with your sword if you swipe accurately enough to hit all of them at once. The boss started charging me, and I got another chance to get some hits in after parrying with my shield as the strike approached. When she finally fell, it felt like I had played an entirely different boss fight than any of the dozens I’ve encountered before in the Zelda series.

See, this sounds fun, and it very well could surprise me, but really it just sounds annoying and boring.  Why can't  I have more than one way to attack enemies?

Gamers have complained for years that Zelda is a franchise content to rely on an age-old formula. You may be collecting keys, taking on bosses, exploring dungeons, and pushing blocks again in Skyward Sword, but the 1:1 MotionPlus swordplay really does make a difference. Many encounters with standard enemies feel like miniature puzzles in their own right, as you have to perform actions like flipping the spider on his back before you can take it out. With a new take on enemy encounters, a visually pleasing art style, real-time weapon switching, and fantastic motion controls, Skyward Sword looks to be a great addition to the Zelda lineage.

Why would I want enemy encounters to be miniature puzzles?  I don't want puzzles, I want mechanics.  Like raid bosses in World of Warcraft.  Like a good boss fight.

Why is it that people complain about the boring dungeons, (because they're full of boring, tedious puzzles) so the solution Aonuma comes up with is to make the overworld like one giant dungeon?  To make the boring puzzles into enemy encounters?

Why is it that the solution to 'you only use items once' is to make that stupid flying Beetleborg morpher used for everything?  It's like the seagulls in Wind Waker, and I didn't think that those were worth revisiting.

I really don't think motion controls will impact the gameplay that much (considering how most of the complaints about the formula aren't centered around pushing B to swing your sword) and I sincerely hope that this game bombs just as bad or worse than the atrocity known as Spirit Tracks.

I don't know if I should be screaming in rage or laughing my head off about this game.  At least Spirit Tracks made that distinction obvious.

And another thing...

http://www.1up.com/news/eiji-aonuma-wraps-zelda-skyward

-In this game, Zelda starts out as a childhood friend of Link's -- and not royalty. "She's not a princess this time," Aonuma said, "which is something I'll pretty much have to put forth right now in order to talk about this title. She's a childhood friend, but she goes away in the midst of the game and it's Link's job to search for her."

...
...
...Nintendo's trolling me, right?

- The starting plot unfolds quite a bit differently from other Zeldas. "This game's plot is something like a school drama, you could say," Aonuma noted with a laugh. "The flying sequence at the E3 demo is Link competing against his classmates. One of them looks kind of a like a bad guy, as you saw, and he shows up in other ways in the game too, since he has a major thing for Zelda."

Yes, that's exactly what we need in Zelda, bad high-school drama ala Kingdom Hearts!

- Despite this, though, the game progresses in a somewhat similar fashion to a previous Zelda title. "The game starts in Skyloft, this city that's floating in the air, and you'll come back to this town multiple times," Aonuma said. "Things are always proceeding along in town, and in that respect it's very much like Majora's Mask. Like with Majora, there are a lot of game events involving the townspeople that get intertwined with the main story. Link, Zelda and their other friends all go to the same boarding school, and you've got teachers and a principal as well. It's a bit of a different setting from previous Zeldas."

 Um...almost all of that stuff in Majora's Mask was optional.(i.e. not part of the main story)  This sounds more like Wind Waker, or Twilight Princess, will all these stupid NPCs that nobody cares about.

- Aonuma's team is making a deliberate effort to give Link new items -- like the boomerang-beetle in the E3 demo -- early on in Skyward Sword. "With previous Zeldas," he said, "the common pattern was that the really neat items wouldn't show up until later on in the game. You need to have the basic item set or it wouldn't be Zelda, so the new items tended to get shunted to the latter part of the game. [Shigeru] Miyamoto said that had to change, like 'This is neat, let's bring it out from the start.' So a lot of neat new items will show up pretty early on."

- Is Skyloft the entire 'world' in this game? "Yes, it's only the people in Skyloft," Aonuma responded. "Nobody on there thinks anything of it, though, because living in Skyloft and flying around on birds is normal to them. They don't have any awareness of there being a mainland beneath the clouds and so forth -- that gets expanded upon once Zelda goes missing, and you get access to the areas under the clouds."

 So...It's like Final Fantasy III (not 6)? Or Baten Kaitos?

- Does everyone in Skyloft have their own personal avian transport? "It's the custom for each person to have one bird. Link has a red one, and it's actually a special and very rare breed of bird -- which is something that makes him get picked on, like 'Why do you get this fancy bird and we don't?!' But it turns out that you need that red bird in order to access the mainland. So the hand of fate gets involved here, like it always does in Zelda games sooner or later."

 Oh, poor picked-on Link, is this supposed to be meta or something?

- Ghiraham, the enemy Link fought in the E3 demo's boss battle, is definitely going to be an important character in Skyward Sword. "The demo shows when you first meet him, and plainly he's looking down at Link, stopping his sword with his fingers and so forth," Aonuma noted. "In terms of story image he's kind of like Dark Link [from Ocarina of Time]; he sees right through Link's moves in battle. You can sort of swing your sword wildly and still hold your own against a lot of foes, but there's no way you can beat Ghiraham like that. You need to keep your distance and watch his moves, and it's something you'll need to change your strategy for. I think he's a pretty good change of pace as bosses go, and he'll change gradually throughout the game."
 

 He's kind of like Dark Link?  Okay...so you beat him by not using Z-targeting?  And what does "in terms of story" mean, anyway?  Dark Link was just kind of...there.

"This game talks about the birth of the Master Sword, and it touches on why Ganondorf showed up. If you play it, I think you'll get some understanding on that. It connects to Ocarina, so if you play Ocarina of Time 3D and move on to this game, I think you'll catch on to a lot of things."

 "Please, play this other, better, game, first.  That way you can know what everyone else has for the past 13 years."

- How's development going along? "The whole game is complete, and we're fine-tuning the balance right now. We were going to have it wholly done by around E3, but there's so much volume to it, neither I nor Miyamoto have gotten to fully play out every aspect. The non-English localizations are proceeding along now, and we're trying to make this a simultaneous worldwide release. You have to put Zelda all out at once or else the story's going to get spoiled -- although, really, there's a ton to enjoy here even if you know a little about the story beforehand."

Oh, yes, this sounds like a fantastic story.  I wouldn't want it spoiled.

This makes absolutely no sense.  Why is it that Nintendo is so intent on changing absolutely everything about Zelda except for the one, small thing we want them to?  Not only that, why do they get to completely destroy the lore that's been set up?  I haven't seen such blatant mockery of the lore (and the fans) since Indiana Jones: Kingdom of the Crystal Skull and the Star Wars prequels.

 

I've finally figured out what Malstrom has known ever since Yoshi's Island, Nintendo has absolutely no intention of giving us the games that we want.  They insist on finding ways to buy the games that they want, and yet New Super Mario Brothers still manages to be in the top 40

I'm not going to get a true, spiritual sequel to Ocarina of Time, I'm not going to get a New! Legend of Zelda.  I'm not even going to get The Last Story.

Screw you, Nintendo.  I'll be giving my money to people who deserve it.  People who know how to listen to customers, like Blizzard.

Or maybe I'll just make the games you refuse to, and get your money.

Even More Zelda Without Zelda

I might do more of these if Nintendo's going to just do all the work for me.

 No Zelda to see here, move along.

Oh, pachter...

Not everyone is convinced that a new Wii would even sell all that well if it did hit store shelves in 2011. In an interview with IndustryGamers earlier this year, Wedbush analyst Michael Pachter said that the chances of the Wii 2 succeeding after a late 2011 launch would be slim. One of the key additions would be HD suppport, which the Xbox 360 and PS3 have had since launch. Pachter sees Nintendo as jumping aboard that train much, much too late.

"I just think Nintendo's blown it; I think by the time they launch [their next console] if it's Christmas 2011, it's two years too late, and for sure one year too late," Pachter said in the interview. "So it's over--I don't think they can ever recover. Wii sales will continue to decline and I think Wii 2 will not sell well."

http://news.cnet.com/8301-13506_3-20056046-17.html (right at the end)

Given that history has shown Michael Pachter to say the complete opposite of the truth, the logical conclusion would be that Nintendo will not release a new console until at least next year, that they're right on time with releasing an HD console (or perhaps a year or two early), that Wii sales can expect a drastic turnaround, and that the Wii 2 (Project cafe) will sell fantastically.

At least he's not calling it a Wii HD.

Wii2/Project Cafe

What is Wii 2/Project Cafe? Here's a starter.


This is exactly what happened with the 3DS, Nintendo leaked information about a new console, it was showcased at the following E3, and came out the following year.  I expect something similar here.



Those who speculate a release for late this year are probably blind, stupid, misinterpreting the facts, misinformed, or purposefully misinforming. (I'll let you decide.)

M:OM

It surprises me how a game involving the wimping out of the main character and a focus on their character and "Maternal Instincts" has that acronym.

It saddens me that the actual gameplay for this game looks ludicrously fun, yet the cutscenes (like lyrics I don't agree with in a song) completely ruin it for me.

It encourages me that I'm not the only one who feels this way.

I've recently discovered a video through my Internet meanderings *cough*malstrom*cough* and I sincerely hope it gets spread around.


I think that Malstrom's e-mailer hit it on the nose when he said that this video embodies everything that is wrong (in similar fashion to how Spirit Tracks embodies everything wrong with Zelda.)

There are many good comments on youtube about this, but my favorite is this one:

SUDDENLY I ONLY CARE ABOUT MY DARK PAST AS A HELPLESS CHILD TO RIDLEY THE 5TH TIME I HAVE TO BLOW HIM UP

Of course, it could do without the whole I CAN HAS CAPSLOCK thing, but even so, it still expresses my thoughts watching through the video.  Samus has had no problem blowing this guy up the past four times (even by Sakamoto 'Canon,' she's already fought Ridley twice) so why is she suddenly all helpless now?  It would make sense if this were a prequel, in fact, I think much of this game would be better suited as a prequel.  Or a movie.  Or a manga.

What I don't understand is why Samus even needs to have characterization in the first place.  Video games are about role play, they're about me taking up the role of someone and making their decisions.  Video games, due to their nature, are event driven, and not plot, character, or time driven.  The story is the story I tell myself.  The other characters are free to have as much characterization and development as is necessary, but the player character is me.

That's one of the things I really like about the original Starcraft, you were the magistrate/commander, cerebrate, or executor.  The characters talked to you and there was no player 'character,' it was you. Of course, there is the Protoss campaign, which has 'your old friend' Fenix, but that just helps you know 'you like this guy.'  In fact, I think that's been one of the things bugging me about Starcraft 2.  Best I can tell, that character that used to be you (during the Terran campaign, anyway) is now this Matt Horner fella.  I liked it better when I was the commander, not this new thing where I think I'm supposed to be Raynor.  It actually feels a lot like Warcraft 3 in that way, that sort of third-person approach to the story.

This wasn't unique to Starcraft, either, as many games were set up to get you in the game. Off the top of my head, I can think of two: The Ultima Series and Star Control 2.

Ultima did a lot of things like this.  You are a hero from Earth.  You become "The Avatar."  Lord British (Richard Gariott, though I don't think that's ever 'said' in the game) is your friend, also from Earth.  As a character, the Avatar doesn't really have much development, aside from the quest to become the Avatar (game 4) and really, each game you pretty much decide your personality with the questions they give you at the beginning.

Another good thing Ultima did right is your party, which you have free reign over.  You ask someone to join you, and they do.  You tell them to leave, and they do (usually they aren't happy about it either.)  As I recall, the party members could affect your game experience, as well. 

The early Castlevania, Zelda, Mario, and most relevantly Metroid games seem to have this sort of attitude.  The player character is rather flat as a character, but they serve as your avatar to the game world.  A sort of archetype for role play. I think really a major problem with video games is that they've moved away from the 'first person' approach to the story and more to a 'third person' one.  Your viewpoint character is no longer you, but just who you're experiencing the story through.

That 'first-person' approach to the story I think is really only something that can be achieved in video games.  Their nature is such that your actions move forward the story.  When you're being told what to do is when people start complaining.

Now I'd like to switch gears a bit and tell you what I find wrong in the video.

1. You have to be told to use super missiles.  If I've got Super Missles, and know how to use them, why do I have to be told?  Oh, I know, it's because the game designers think I'm stupid.  Like in Spirit Tracks, where there has to be a big cutscene (read: interrupting gameplay.)  to explain how to use a key. "hey look, a key!  I wonder where we use it"  "Hey look a door, we need a key.  I have an idea! try that key you found earlier!"

It would be something else, and probably better game design in general, to just have something where the tutorial pops up when you've shown you need it.  You don't need to authorize Super Missiles, let me have them from the start, and when I use regular missiles to try and blow up something that takes Super Missiles, then you tell me to use them.  If I still can't do it, come up with the tutorial.

Of course, that could be what actually happens in the game, so I could eat my words.

2. Samus is a power ranger.  I've actually been thinking about this since I saw the 'laughably hardcore' trailer, where she is shown 'morphing.'  In this one, she even 'de-morphs' while she's getting tossed around by Ridley.  I actually wonder if this game would be better with that mindset, like how my brother commented that the new TRON movie is about ghosts and specters (from SC2) and now I think I'll have a lot of fun with that one.  think about it, you have Samus as the outcast of the group, the 6th ranger, Adam as the red Ranger, the black guy as the...um...never mind.


Actually, that brings me to another point.
3. Obligatory black guy.  This might stem from Japanese media copying American stereotypes, but even so, that's no excuse.  Want a cast with some racial diversity?   I again point to Starcraft, the second one this time.  To me, there isn't really any obvious tokenism.  I didn't really get the feeling of stereotypes, as much as archetypes.  There's the war general, the Hoodoo man, really the only stereotypes I noticed were the news anchors.


4. She's blown up Ridley already.  Four times.  She's blown up the Space Pirate Homeworld twice (no idea how that works, but whatever)  How is she now having problems with her past?  Again, this would be better as a prequel.

5. Samus looks like a Barbie doll.  I don't mean just because she's got blond hair and that, but she looks like she's made out of plastic.  Everyone does in this game.  The physics are weird, too.  sub-90s or something.  It just overall doesn't look right. (they might be passable in a children's show, but that's only because people think kids are stupid).

I'm really just 'meh' about this game.  I'm definitely not paying full price for it.

The puzzling thing about video games

I've heard 2D platformers as being 'puzzles in disguise,' and I think that really shows the nature of a game.  People complain about puzzles in Zelda, or Mario, but it is not the puzzle that is the problem.  The problem is that you can see the puzzle.  Think for a moment of a game you have played that had a great level design.  Now think of a game which had really poor level design.  What is the difference?   Take Final Fantasy XIII for example: I haven't played the game, but the most common complaint I hear is that for the first 20 hours of the game you are doing little more than running forward, pressing A, and watching a cut-scene.  How boring.  I would like you to think now of a puzzle game you may have played recently.  What was a really fun one?  What was a really boring one?

I would now like you to imagine a Sudoku or other number puzzle.  (If you don't know what Sudoku is, or feel a hankering for one, here's a good site for them.  You should try one.)  Anyways, suppose you are solving the puzzle and you reach a point where you have the option of putting a 5 or a 3 in a box.  What if it were possible to solve the puzzle with either number in that square?  Just imagine, solving the same puzzle while at the same time solving it differently each time.  Re-solvability right there!  Do you think that sounds fun?

If you do, great.  You're a better puzzle solver than me.  I don't think it sounds fun at all.  I actually thought it did at first, but then I thought about it:  if it's possible to solve with either number, how do I know if I'm doing it right?  How can I check the solution when I'm done to see if I messed up?  If it's possible to have more than one number in that box, is it possible for the rest of them?  Is it possible to have more than one number in a row, column, or block?   Really, if this were possible, what you would have is no Sudoku, but a simple grid where you can fill in whatever number you want.  Without the rules of Sudoku, it's no fun.

You may be able to guess the point I'm getting to.  My point is that video games are, at their heart, puzzles.  And the best kind of puzzles are the ones that can be solved in multiple ways.  Even puzzles like Sudoku have multiple ways to solve them, even if you end up putting the same number in the same square each time.  This is what is meant when, say, Malstrom says that the crux of a game's content is the interesting choices you can make as a player.  (as he puts it: "do I jump on the goomba or jump over it?)

The problem arises when the game maker doesn't understand this.  The complaint of it being the same every time is meant with a branching storyline and/or multiple endings, essentially letting you have the option of putting a 3 in the box instead of a 5.  And it does lead to a different ending, a different solution.  But if that is the case, wouldn't that mean that I haven't really solved the puzzle until I've found each possible variation at each junction point?  I thought branching storylines sounded cool at first, but then I got fed-up with those "choose your own adventure" books when I had to read through each possible situation to find the "Best" set of events, trying to find the "real" ending.  The same goes for any Video games with branching stories or multiple endings.  It's like a way to force me to replay the game, when really it feels like busywork.

And who wouldn't be excited about a user-generated Sudoku?  You mentioned that earlier, essentially what it is is a 100-page Sudoku book with only about 15 of the puzzles set up.  The rest is left up to you, the solver!  Why, you could even make your own game, and make a grid without Sudoku rules if you wanted to!  So much creative potential!  You could put a 27 in one of the boxes! so creative! 

 ...Wait, who are you and what's with the abrasive color to your font?

 Oh, by the way, the company created those 9x9 grids, so anything you make from them belongs to that company, and isn't yours.  And what do you mean you paid for 100 Sudoku but only got 15? you can make your own, you get to be creative!  isn't your creative potential worth more than that $50? 

*boot*

Yeah, User Generated Content is the extreme variant of multiple endings.  I didn't really expect to take the Sudoku comparison that far, but it works out far better than I'd planned. 

At any rate, in case I didn't make my point clear enough:  Games are, at their heart, puzzles.  The way to make a good game is to give me multiple ways in which I can solve the problem.  This is a problem I see with many independent games, they really have only one way to beat each level.  When you beat the game, you solved the puzzle and really there's no point to play it again.

There's something I've noticed with the older Zelda games, they typically had multiple ways to do things.  While sometimes you needed one item or another to access an area or dungeon, the item was more than just a key.  It had other uses.  Link to the Past had you figure out for yourself that you could hook onto jars (skulls, in the Dark World) and there were no big, obvious targets with the "Use Hookshot Here" recently erased.

So, funny story.  I wrote the above (everything before the above paragraph, rather) because I read through part of this interview of Warren Spector about Epic Mickey.  (My post concerning Malstrom's post where I got that link from is in the works.)

Then I went back and read this:

How can it be more mainstream to insist that players have the skill to solve the puzzle the way the designer intended, or have the skill to defeat the thing by shooting it 10,000 times while its back is turned and its right foot is up, rather than just saying, "Hey, solve this problem the way you want, player!"

 And this:

In addition to paint and thinners, we have a secondary mechanic. I think every game needs at least two mechanics, a core and a secondary, to provide enough variety for players - especially an RPG. You can find these sketches which you can make real in the world, and they all have multiple uses. They’re like the tools in the Zelda games – in a Zelda game you basically use the tools for one purpose in the places the designers tell you to use them. You can use our tools anywhere.

And then I suddenly started to get very interested in Epic Mickey.

a few more quotes I found interesting:

If you look back at the games I’ve made, no one’s going to say they’re the best looking games in the world. I always put gameplay ahead of graphics, I always thought I would.

How much of a challenge have you found designing the camera?
We have the challenges that no other designers have had with a camera in a third person game. Designing a camera is hard enough, but imagine doing it when the wall behind the player may or may not exist – or the floor beneath the player may disappear. The camera troubles with this game are epic believe me, and I guarantee we’ll be tuning the camera the day Disney prise this out of my hands.

 I did notice problems with the camera, though I had to hear someone at E3 comment about it before I realized that that was what it was.  I just thought it looked like a Nintendo 64 game.  That's why it does.  It's good to hear that they're working on it.  I hope it works out. (as many early 3D games showed, a bad camera can kill an otherwise great game)

E3 Impressions: Legend of Zelda

So, here we go, I'm going to watch through Nintendo's press conference, and try to kind of leave my impressions here.


Cell shading?  I'm not so sure, it makes me think of Wind Waker.
Skyward Sword, huh?  I like it!

Bill Trinnen demoing, dag nabbit, it actually looks fun.

Mushrooms, hm...


Sword beams?!? holy crap, holy crap, holy crap...

Miyamoto is demoing it now,

swordfighing inspired by Wii sports resort? [expletive]!


Potion drinking is in real time?

Don't have to point at the screen to aim the slingshot?

Items not assigned to buttons?

Rolling bombs ala Wii sports bowling? Nice.

Bow & Arrow also inspired by Wii Sports Resort?  Very nice.

Whip?  Oh please let there be Indiana Jones throwbacks.


Crap, I'm sold.  Time to start up the "can't wait 'til next year" calendar

EDIT: Also of note is the fact that the Master sword is PROMINENTLY displayed.

Monster burger

I must say, Nintendo's advertisement department is certainly doing their job.  If you haven't seen this or the other commercials for Monster Hunter Tri, then go to youtube and find them.  They're as hilarious as this one.

I really want to play this game, and I think that these commercials actually had their part in that.  The game itself looks fun, too!

Returning a favor

Gee, does this look familiar? at all?

I just can't seem to place it.

Oh, wait, I know!

Yeah, that's what it reminds me of.  Definitely.

Alright, People are Funny #3

I'm officially making this a series, since there's just too much good stuff out there. I'll be posting stuff like this all the time, so I might as well distinguish it.

Is he serious? Is he sarcastic? I don't care; he made me laugh, and deserves my hits to his site. 'if you are in the game industry you ignore Nokia at your peril' and yet the Wii is not just doomed, but already 'dead'.

The Wii 'was cheaper, it had that breakthrough gesture interface and it had a catalogue of amazing Nintendo first party games that were must haves for any keen gamer.' Yes, because everyone attributes the monstrous sales of the Nintendo Gamecube to their 'amazing first party titles' and 'cheaper price.' Why would these two be any part of the Wii's success when they didn't help the Gamecube at all?

It just gets better with the more I read of his articles and their comments.

Enjoy.

New Final Fantasy?

Well, that was fast. Final Fantasy XIII isn't even out in America, and it looks like Squeenix is already busy making a new one for the Wii!

You can't fool me with that 'metroid' nonsense, Game Industry, I know a Squeenix game when I see one!

A plea for Nintendo

I know you have guys working on the new Zelda. I know that Eiji Aonuma is now the guy in charge of development, and I know that these guys love to put puzzles and trains into a fantasy Action/RPG because Mr. Aonuma's son likes it.

But please, PLEASE do something for me. Not just me, but every fan of your beloved series.

I've had Wii Sports Resort sitting around for a while, and I haven't played it much since I bought it, but today I decided to pull it out. I tried something that I hadn't played before, the "challenge" under the swordplay option.

DO SOMETHING LIKE THIS IN ZELDA WII! I can't express in words the amount of fun that I had playing the challenge mode, but I can say that the amount of fun I had wasn't in just playing the game; while I was playing I envisioned a full game devoted to this sort of combat system, dreamed of one day playing as Link, cutting down enemies left and right. The glee I felt playing, the satisfaction when I finished a level, I haven't felt these lately outside of New Super Mario Brothers Wii.

Please, I know I don't speak alone, and I know that with every Zelda game you make, more and more of your loyal fanbase leaves. Spirit Tracks was the breaking point for me. Despite the train I still had hope, but I put it down after I made it through the first dungeon and haven't picked it up since. I doubt I will be picking it back up anytime in the near future. One can only take so much. I have a glimmer of hope still deep within, waiting for more information on Zelda Wii, but given what you've let fly in recent games, I suspect that that small glimmer will be finally extinguished.

You are not immortal; despite what the 'hardcore' 90's crowd says, people will not keep buying whatever you put out simply because it's got your brand. The reason we've been sticking with you all these years is because of your consistency in putting out good games. Your current games aren't necessarily bad, but they aren't the same franchises that put you at the top, though they may share the name or look.

Please, make a New Legend of Zelda. The sales of both New Super Mario Brothers DS and Wii should not surprise you; these are the games we've been waiting for. Make a "new" Legend of Zelda, a "New" Starfox, and give me a reason to buy them, and not the ones on the Virtual Console instead. Learn from the success of New Super Mario Brothers Wii.

Aonuma is killing your franchise, and I wish you could see that. Put a leash on him before it's too late.

More Malstrom

I hate to turn this blog into some sort of Malstrom shrine, but this guy continually amazes me. For starters, on Christmas Day, he got so bent out of shape due to 'green' packaging that he declared the 'last blog entry.' Today, however, he's admitted that he'll continue his blog, though with a little less pro-Nintendo stance.

Perhaps most interesting of all, Today's post is an e-mail in which the mailer says to Malstrom "you’ve become the last bit of sanity on the complete internet," and begs him to continue the Blog. In his response, Malstrom links to a GAF thread in which virtually every other post calls him insane (with no reason for the assertion, mind you.) And in one hilarious post, one member said "Just ignore the dude, he'll go away eventually." Of course he will, like the Wii will 'go away eventually.' It's really funny how people are reacting to this the same way that they reacted when the Wii sales dropped; All sorts of glee.

Personally, I'm glad that he's decided to continue his blog, and hope that he continues, if only to keep giving these people the slaps in the faces that they deserve.

Violence and Video Games

Funnily enough, this post started out as a reply to a post in one of the forums I go to. In it, I use many arguments which have only come to me as part of reading up on Malsrom's stuff. Seriously, if you haven't already read this guy's stuff, at least his article on birdmen, you owe it to yourself to do so.

Anyway, here's my (revised and expanded) post:

Video games are getting more violent. There isn't really any way around that fact. Does this mean that everyone who plays these games is going to go on a violent rampage, ala The signal?

Probably not.

It is, however, an indication of something different. There is a 'niche' market that like the gratuitous violence and/or sex in video games. The games need to be "Hardcore" just as they see themselves as "Hardcore" gamers. For those of you who've heard of That Guy with the Glasses or specifically Linkara, you'll know what I mean when I say that this 'niche' market, the "Hardcore" gamer is, essentially, "the 90s kid." You all know who I mean, many of you four reading this are probably that guy. The "Hardcore" gamer, the guy who thinks that an "M" rating automatically makes a game good,(and automatically makes any game without an "M" rating inferior.) These are the people who bought a Playstation because it boasted "Mature content" and hate the Nintendo Wii because it's "ruining gaming."

Games are not for fun to the "90s kid", it is an "art" that should be put against movies or books, after all, many of the games have "Good story" and "Deep characters," (both of which would be laughed out of Hollywood) but at the same time, the game can't bee too 'linear.' Games are "serious business," and should take over 40 hours of time; these people are willing to give up two days of their life to beat this game.

The current gaming market is being overrun with "90s kid"s. This is the 'something different' I mentioned earlier. What's happening is that more and more games are getting catered to the "90s kid" and as a result, most games out there are made for the "90s kid." These are the games that get advertised the most, and thusly get the most attention. The people who don't like these games end up just quitting the whole gaming scene altogether. I am, unfortunately, one of these people.

In other words, Gaming is stuck in the 90s.

This is actually the reason why Nintendo's Wii is so successful. With games getting catered to this 'niche' market, most people were alienated from games. The Wii not only provides these alienated people with the means to easily play games, but provides them with the type of games that they want to play. Miyamoto himself has said that "It is [Nintendo's] duty to produce alternatives to GTA."

The Nintendo 'revolution' was scoffed at, and was set to be a giant flop. Why? because the only people looking at it were "90s kid"s. The gaming market at the time of course would see in the Wii a "weaker" console, full of "kid games" (read: not "M" rated, First Person Shooter, and/or "sandbox" games.) The secret to the success of the Wii is that it didn't cater to the "90s kid," They instead made a console for the people who bought an NES. The people who, like myself, have been ostracized for not being "Hardcore."

I sincerely hope that Nintendo "ruins" the gaming industry in the way it's been doing: providing alternatives to Grand Theft Auto, and making games that can be played without a controller with a ridiculous amount of buttons.